Hm. I guess theres must have been a reason for that? I could be wrong.
P.S totally sang out the “somebody that I used to know” song.
No doubt. And who is this exactly? Can’t really “chill” with a faceless stranger..
I went there this summer for a good week. It was great being back.
To actually live there..hopefully after college. Really hoping.
Why. You wanna chill?
For me, I’ve always felt disconnected with people. I don’t know when exactly or how. I always had that feeling that I didn’t belong anywhere, you know. That no one understands me. It’s also because I don’t let them understand me. It becomes a challenge where I have to express or tell someone everything about me. It’ll be like, I don’t know, someone stripping me naked and see me for who I really am. And honestly, that’s scary. People are just people. In a way, I don’t find them important. At the end of the day, I’m all I ever have. I’m always alone, by myself. To me, that’s fine. I enjoy solitude. Some people might think it lonesome but it’s not. It’s one of the best way to find myself. I preferably like being alone actually. I like to shut out everything around me…because at times, people get noisy. It gets irritating. Ha-ha. Although, limitedly, it is nice to socialize/”connect” with people. Because my mind get chaotic, and if I don’t talk to someone once in awhile, I’ll go mad. In a way, people keep me sane. But lately, I’ve been exhausted. Overload with people and things…Lately, people have make me feel so guilty by being “selfish.” People have been making me feel unnoticed, not invisible, but unnoticed. As in, they know I’m there but they choose not to notice me. You know. I can’t connect with people at times. I guess I never felt closed off, I mean,… if I never open myself to people. But it’s alright. Somewhere, someone, is with me on this. Everything will be okay at the end. Not great, okay, just right enough. I don’t know if this is the response that you are looking for.. but its the best I got. (Stay safe. Be humble. Be happy. Stranger.)